Norman's Feelings

This was posted by my friend Norman yesterday on the Impotance Group. With his permission I an adding it to my blog.

Good morning men,


Once again it is one of those times of year when the expression of love and
pro-creation is abundant in the world. I cringe and shake at times because the
accusation comes to mind that I am an outcast to these activities. The
previous past 4 years I continually descended into a deeper state of depression,
frustration, self pity, anguish and eventually torment.

I want to share a portion of an email I sent at the height of my depression when
I was looking for help. And I wantto share my first steps to a comeback.


*** 6/30/08 Heal my Perspective

I have suffered what I call dignity abuse. It is the assault of my self
perception. I am in search of seeing myself as whole and not broken. I have
many 'cut to the bone' experiences.
In this affliction I live a life hiding and fleeing all my days.

I have problems with concepts and statements like 'Live life to its fullest'.
I am exhausted and no longer trust hope. I am as a man that hides from a savage
wild beast. It see me and I see it.

Impotence is crushing me. It is killing me slowly. Has anyone had growth or
life to their withered blossom? Can you help me heal my perspective. It is
always from the torment of brokenness and never from the state of a good
beginning.

Hope has made me lie to myself. I fear accepting this because it is not the
real me. It is a disease or an affliction but it is not me. I have it but I
can't get rid of it. I am like a blind man who has sight for 15 seconds and
then returns to blindness.

How can I understand manhood and the natural use of the sex. For those of you
who have read the Bible. I am in distress as the man at the pool of Bethesda.
Someone always gets in before me and I have no one to truly help me. Year after
year I know, wait, and hope but in the end I am just unhealed and let down.

I don't know how to do this anymore. I need closure. Existing in the state of
continual trying is a sore evil and daily vexation. Help me escape the prison
of my mind. The scars of heart, the let downs and the mis understanding.

The initial joy when I see men who are whole; and then the sorrow for to me it
is withheld. Rejections, poverty, death- Nothing hurts me more than this.

If you have the power of truth-Please set me free.


***

12/24/2011 Perspective in Healing

Men we are more than the sum of our parts. Today I am reminded of Master Po.
A fictional character in a old Tv show called Kung Fu. Fully blind but every
other sense in his body was maxed out to its fullest. Hearing, smelling,
tasting, touching, mental prowess.

If he were able to see yet was impotent he would use all of his other senses to
live out and maintain a wonderful relationship. He would appreciate her beauty,
her scent, her voice, her person. He would caress her with tender love and he
would sexually stimulate her. He would hold her close and he would smile and
delight to be in her presence.

He would receive and give necking with all the joy of youth;as a boy reaching
first base. He would enjoy the tickling as she touched him, the hardness and
sensuality of their firm nipples with all the joy of a youth;as a boy reaching
second base.

She would stimulate him in the perineum and prostate if he had one. The massage
between the thigh and groin would ever so move him. He would stimulate her
clitoris and caress her vagina. He would receive this with all the joy of
youth; as a boy reaching third base.

Together they were fulfilled one climaxing bodily, one climaxing in the heart
both climaxing in spirit for the two are more than one part.! He would recieve
this with all the joy of youth; as a boy reaching fourth base.

***

Whether your impotence is temporary of permanent in physical ability. Follow
the example of Master Po and re align your perspective. Be not mis informed by
mis informed people. Often a NO is a Yes somewhere else.

It feels GREAT to be on the road to recovery. Both mentally and physically.
If I had a friend like the analogy of Master Po. I would have never wasted 4
years of my life and damaging 4 years with my wife. I could have been as the
joy of a youthful boy running around the bases!!!!


Try it. Allow it to happen. It's Truth.


Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays,

I walk with you!


Norman

THE PHYSIOLOGICAL ASPECT

MEN OBSESS ABOUT OUR PENIS

I posted this on the Peyronies Society Fourm and it needs repeated here.

Re: She didn't notice
« Reply #5 on: December 03, 2011, 09:47:33 AM » Quote Modify

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can I say something:

We guys obsess about our penis our ladies are just glad to be with us no matter what. Like I have told many a young man "The size of your penis does not make you a man."

The beautiful green eyed lady I have been married to for over 43 years, (no she is not blond), has been with me through all my journey with peyronies, ED, venous leakage, corporal fibrosis. Then a failed implant attempt. Now a successful implant. The one statement she made to me still brings a joy to my life. "Jack, I did not marry you for your penis." She was by my side through my journey.

I lost over 1 1/2" inches to peyronies. It concerned me but never bothered her. When I came out of surgery at Vanderbilt she had talked with Dr. Milam. I saw that gleam in those beautiful green eyes and knew all was well.

The first night I was home after my implant was activated I lay on my back with a hard on sticking straight up, no pills, no shots just me. I was still 1 1/2" shorter than before peyronies but it did not matter any more.

Over the last 3 years I have been able to gain about 90% of the loss back because of the skills of Dr. Milam and the LGX. I asked her how I felt sexually now to her than before. She told me she never noticed the difference I feel just the same as always.

Guys, we have to stop obsessing over our problems. The women that love us don't care about the size or shape of our penis. That is a man thing. They love us for the man we are.

I have had the privilege of talking with many men that had progressed to the stage with this mess I have. It takes time for implant surgery to heal. One single young man kept telling me I can't a girl will reject me, I can't I have lost too much size to satisfy her, just on and on. Well about 2 months ago he meet a young lady and it was love at first sight for her. One evening after a date he was with her and she started to try to get into his pants. He told he whoa! you need to know something. She asked what? He told her "I'm Bionic." She asked what did that mean, he briefly told her he had an implant. She told him I don't care I want you anyway.

That night he learned a couple of things. The fact he had an implant did not matter, the size of his penis did not matter, that he could satisfy her and he could go longer than any guy his age. Since then they have been almost constant companions.

What I am trying to say is we can not let this damn disease get us down. There is help and hope for all of us. Love the lady you are with and she will give you more than you ever expected. The most important thing is NEVER - EVER / NEVER - EVER / NEVER - EVER - EVER GIVE UP!!!!

Just my feeling this morning.

Jackp
http://jackp-penileimplant.blogspot.com/